Marital Proof: ‘Live the List’ Has a Fighting Chance

Some of my best blog posts are short and sweet – concise narratives that would be completely ruined with one of my typical 500- or 750-word essays.

I once wrote about a text message from my mom, reminding me to “live every minute.”

I also penned a pithy blog post when my dog woke up my neighbor at the crack of dawn. It was a letter that I wrote her after she banged on my front door at 5:45 in the morning.

Both of these posts were short, sweet and wonderfully great!

I’m hoping this blog post falls into that category.

– – –

My wife and I were recently having a spirited discussion…er…OK…it was a bona fide fight. It was so “spirited,” I don’t really remember how it started or what it was about. I can only assume that she was right, and I was wrong (like usual).

Live the ListAt one point of the argument, my Live the List Project came up. I’m sure it had something to do with me writing my book, specifically why I was dragging my feet on doing it.

I quickly went on the defensive.

ME: “Why don’t you believe in what I’m trying to do?”

TK: “I do!”

ME: “It sure as hell doesn’t seem like it. I have people tell me all the time that this has the potential to change people’s lives…”

TK: “I think it does, too!”

ME: “No you don’t, Tanya!”

I was loud and firm, because I was upset. I wanted her to whole-heartedly believe in me. I wanted her to believe in Live the List.

She just sat there.

The silence was deafening.

I fought back tears.

Confession: My wife is the one person who I want in my corner the most. At that moment, I wasn’t even sure if she was in the same ring as me.

Then something wonderfully great happened…

TK broke the silence with a calm and deliberate tone, “I do believe in you, Drew, and I think what you’re trying to do is inspiring and admirable.”

I stared at the floor.

Ily Birthday“Whatever,” I thought to myself. Again, I was bitter and defensive.

She continued: “You know that list you inspired me to make? I have no idea where it is, and I barely remember what’s on it. But you know what? When Ily Belle turned one, I made her a birthday dress. I started sewing it the day before her party, and I locked myself upstairs as guests started to arrive so I could finish it…do you know why?”

I looked up at her.

“Because making that dress was on my stupid list,” she said firmly. “I wrote it down – so I was going to do it, damn it.”


She gave the slightest little smirk.

There was no expression on my face, but my heart was smiling.

It’s hard to explain the joy that filled my soul. It was like rays of the sun peaked through the clouds on a dreary winter day. It was one of the first times my wife had ever talked about her list. When I would ask her about it from time to time, I felt like she was always annoyed or disinterested.

At that moment, I realized TK was behind me! (AND the potential power of Live the List had revealed itself again.)

I almost started crying again – this time, happiness and inspiration was leading the charge.

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